Ill-gotten Goods

i am a biscuit licker.

at least, that is the polite version.

the redneck with the stolen speakers who came up with this moniker was a bit rougher on the vernacular.

it came out more like: "are you a...'biskit likker'?"

which is way more obscene than the correct spelling in much the same way that "nekkid" is a more vulgar nudity than "naked". perhaps it comes from the south's fascination with multiple uses of the letter "k" in any word, shopping center or political acronym.

and he was right, the redneck with the stolen speakers.

i am a biskit likker.

a biskit is baked, a biskit is eaten and, in the middle, a biskit gets likked. i like to think that each of us falls along the continuum of biskit consumption. I am glad to know my place, on my knees, tongue out and expectant, like a choir boy and communion.

i am a lesbian and i lik biskits.