ruling trash

we don't come from good stock. at least not by white trash standards.

i know that sounds like an oxymoron: "white trash" and "standards". but even we have our own form of pedigree.

for instance, my uncle C-Bob married a Starling. and anyone who ever grew up poor in the south or watched "silence of the lambs" knows how high up on the trailer park starlings rank. to marry one is to marry fortune. what competes for fortune can be scandalous and beastly to consider.
like when my uncle C-Bob announced that his new "finance" was a starling, my father said, "yep. you can tell she's a starling. all the womens got hair betwixt their breasts." (it is a peculiarity of ours that we use the word "betwixt", a quaint, nearly religious sounding word with a hint of romance. my father, a preacher, used it both in the pulpit and when saying really inappropriate and outrageous thing to us young'uns like: there has been no sex betwixt your mother and i because you kids are wearing her out!") and indeed my aunt S-jean does have hair betwxit her breasts. why that is a glory for a starling i can only surmise. perhaps it ensured healthy off-spring, who would be sure to find excellent purchase on that aristocratic tuft of hair while they nursed and felt the specialness of their mother.

i am but a pretender to trailer park nobility.